Voltaire speaks and I listen

"The perfect is the enemy of the good." ~ Voltaire


The exact translation of this quote is in dispute; in the original French, it was "Le mieux est l'ennemi du bien," which can also translate to "The best is the enemy of the good." I have read some comments about its meaning as a call to arms against mediocrity - which I heartily endorse - but I have found the first translation to be more helpful and more meaningful in my work and in my life.

I read the quote originally in a short article on environmentalism. The author, Laurie David, wrote that the goal of being perfectly green kept untold numbers of people from trying any environmental preservation efforts at all. Since they were unable to give up their homes in the suburbs and the cars they needed to get around, people assumed that their small efforts to bring reusable bags to the store or to hang laundry on the line would be useless. Never mind that the collective small efforts of many people can make a big difference. Never mind that it is good for everyone to feel and take some responsibility to make the world a better place. It is not perfect, but it is good.

In striving to create inclusive communities, I believe that perfection is the enemy, particularly if we are so busy worrying about "getting it right" that we don't make efforts to get it going at all. An example from my work this week - it is the beginning of winter sports season and several of my students and former students tried out for sports teams. Only one young man made the team he tried out for, because there were eight slots on the team and he was one of eight players that tried out. The other two did not, because there were more capable players than there were places on the team.



In a perfect world, everyone who tried out and wanted to play could play. In a perfect world, everyone would have a real role on the team. But this isn't a perfect world- as a matter of fact, it's high school...

Perfect? No. Good? I think so.

My students, the coaches, and I felt that the boys deserved a chance to try out like everyone else. If they made the teams fair and square, good. If they didn't make the team, the same happened to many of their peers. Maybe they will choose to work as managers on the team, maybe they will try again next year, or maybe not. What is important is that they had the same chance as anyone else to join in high school sports.

And I can tell you, this attitude would not have existed 20 years ago. Even allowing a try-out would have been unthinkable. We all would have been afraid that the kids would have been injured or terribly discouraged by not making the team. We would have been caught in the trap of perfection, too afraid to try for good, because good might not have been good enough.

The coaches were worried - they are sensitive to the feelings of their potential players. I assured them that giving the kids the chance was good enough. The chance to manage the team? Even better. It's up to the kids what good they wish to make of this; they need to decide what is good for them.

We didn't have 2.4 children - but the families we have, with all their flaws, are very good.

We didn't get the corner office - but the job has a lot of good in it.

We didn't get into the best college - but our college was good, in spite of (because of?) its faults.

Our lives aren't perfect, but they are deeply good.

When we are over-focused on perfection, we miss the good that surrounds us.

Perfect is only the surface; good goes all the way down.

Also by Voltaire...
Aime la vérité, mais pardonne à l'erreur.
Love truth, but pardon error.

Sometimes, good is better than we give it credit for...

Planning or hoping?

Unusual picture, this, from an unusual source. My husband has the world's greenest thumb and grows an extensive vegetable garden. However, he hasn't planted squash in years; this abundant crop came from our compost pile. We toss our vegetable waste in the pile and often wind up with gourds, pumpkins, and this (quite tasty, actually) bumper crop of squash. While we are tending the rest of the garden, the squash was growing untended and unnoticed.

Sometimes we get lovely moments of serendipity like this. But other times, we wind up with a bunch of boring gourds that aren't even worth placing on the Thanksgiving table because they are so commonplace. I'm open to sheer luck, but I'm a believer in planning.

This month's edition of Teaching Exceptional Children was all about futures planning for students with special needs, including an article entitled "I Can" and "I did"- Self Advocacy for Young Students with Developmental Disabilities (Kleinert, Harrison, Fisher, and Kleinert). The article describes the work of the Kentucky Youth Advocacy Project (http://www.kyap.org/). KYAP teaches children, young people, and professionals how to set and work towards self-selected goals. The year-long project culminates in a celebration of the students' efforts, where they present their progress and success to the group.

In spite of remaining troubles, I believe we have done very, very well accommodating and teaching students with special needs. But one area in which we are lacking is teaching them how to teach themselves - how to plan and persevere, not just to hope for the good luck that someone will be there to help them.

Sometimes, the compost pile is full of great vegetables. But I'll bet on the bounty of a planned garden any day...

This seems to be a wall

Somehow, I got musing on the idea of walls - those apparently insurmountable obstacles that keep us from getting to where we want to go (My husband, son, and I learned that not even a GPS system in a rental car can get you through a wall to a gated community, but that is a story for another day...)

Then, my mind turned to the idea, "Well, if the wall is there and I need to get past it, how many ways can I think of to do so?" Here's a partial list

• Build a ladder


• Build a staircase


• Raise money to install an elevator


• Dig under it


• Keep walking until you find a way around it


• Gather a group of friends and make a human pyramid to climb it


• Then, toss down a rope for others to climb up, too


• All of you learn how to rock climb! (We don't need no stinkin' ropes!)


• Use a sledgehammer and try to break it. Again, you'll need some friends


• Divert a river to flood the area in front of it and ride over it on a giant inner tube


• Build a hot air balloon and float over it


• Train a bunch of birds to lift you in a harness over the wall.


• Keep the wall, but paint a mural on it


• Turn around and walk away from the wall. Find another place to go.


• Sit there and blame the wall for wrecking your life


• Make peace with the wall

And that's just from a few minutes of creative musing. What walls are in front of us? How are we going to get around them, if we choose to do so?

An idea whose time has come...

Below is a link to a speech by Aimee Mullins, given at the TED (Technology, Entertainment, Design) Conference. Ms. Mullins, who is an athlete, actress, model, and speaker, discusses the hidden meanings of the term disability and how these meanings can impact the lives of people living with the experience of disability. She shares many of our beliefs that disability is a real, but limited construct and should not be anyone's primary definition. She says it all far better than I ever could; hence the link below.

I love the concept of the TED Foundation (its mission statement is below). How else can we share the many new ideas about disability issues?


The goal of the foundation is to foster the spread of great ideas. It aims to provide a platform for the world's smartest thinkers, greatest visionaries and most-inspiring teachers, so that millions of people can gain a better understanding of the biggest issues faced by the world, and a desire to help create a better future. Core to this goal is a belief that there is no greater force for changing the world than a powerful idea. Consider:
An idea can be created out of nothing except an inspired imagination.
An idea weighs nothing.
It can be transferred across the world at the speed of light for virtually zero cost.
And yet an idea, when received by a prepared mind, can have extraordinary impact.
It can reshape that mind's view of the world.
It can dramatically alter the behavior of the mind's owner.
It can cause the mind to pass on the idea to others.

Aimee Mullins: The opportunity of adversity Video on TED.com

Springing Up

"I believe in human beings, but my faith is without sentimentality. I know that in environments of uncertainty, hunger, and fear, a human being is dwarfed and shaped without being aware of it, just like a plant struggling under a stone does not know its own condition. Only when the stone is removed can it spring up freely into the light. But the power to spring up is inherent and only death puts an end to it. "- Pearl S. Buck

I took this picture during a hike today. This tree is literally hanging on by a single root, but somehow it's enough for the tree to continue to grow leaves and live, in spite of the harsh wind and the cold of central New York.

Life is a process of casting off stones, the ones we see and feel, and the ones we don't even know are there. But life still exists under the stone; as long as there is one root, there is still life and the possibility of growth.

Take a stone inventory- what is holding us down? What are our uncertainties? What are our fears? But most important - what are our hungers? What do we hunger to do in our lives? What do we hunger for in the lives of those we love and support?

Enviable... and ordinary.

Those who are lucky enough to have HBO, be sure to tune in on Wednesday, October 14, 2010 for the premiere of the documentary Monica & David (pictured at the left, where their film won Best Documentary at the TriBeca Film Festival). The film tells the story of the couple's wedding and their first year of marriage - the beautiful (the scene in the trailer where Monica says her vows moved me deeply), the boring (doing chores), and most of all, the extremely ordinary nature of their lives.
Why is it so hard for us as a country to accept that when people love each other, they should marry and live together? Intimate relationships are our most natural supports; we should be encouraging everyone who is prepared to commit to another person, through the beautiful, the boring, and the extremely ordinary parts of life, to do so.
Remember every wedding you have ever attended - didn't the officiant ask all the guests to do what they could to help support the new couple? And didn't we promise to do so? I have- as my dear friends and family have helped my husband and me in our marriage.
Good luck to Monica and David... and to every other couple brave enough to take the leap.

Enviable Lives- Jessica Park

Someday, treat yourself to the privilege of reading The Siege: The First Eight Years of an Autistic Child and Nirvana: A Daughter's Life with Autism by the late Clara Claiborn Park. Her daughter, Jessy, is pictured above in a photo from the Boston Globe. Ms. Park is an accomplished painter who is represented by Pure Vision Arts. She is also a long-time employee of Williams College, and the mail room of the college has recently been re-named in her honor.

Jessica was diagnosed when autism was virtually unheard of; she was fortunate to have been born into an educated, intelligent, and determined family. Even with the loss of her most vocal advocate - her mother- Jessica still has a large community of support and she continues to build upon her experiences and successes. She and her family have created a life that anyone would envy.